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Sagpa Diri, Dapog Didto

These past few months, I have been living my life by myself thinking that I’m totally in control of it. I go out with friends almost every day off and we most often indulge in not so clean activities. I spend my money on useless things and I delight myself on things of this world. I forgot my God.

Last March, I re-committed myself to the Lord and told Him that I would be obedient and I will try very hard to change my ways. But maybe because my determination to do that was not enough, old habits always recur. Now, I’m back to my old self -- not praying, not spending time with Him, not paying attention to Him, and not obeying Him. The only thing that I’ve been very faithful in doing is the giving of tithes.

But I do recognize the misconduct that I have been doing. That is why I tell God every time I pray, “Lord, I know that I am very disobedient and I am not determined enough to follow you. Please Lord, do everything You have to do to discipline me. If You have to whip me, If You have to slap me on the face, If you have to hurt me just to force me to kneel down and pray to You, please do it Lord.”

God do hear prayers! My most recent setbacks showed me that indeed He is in control of everything. I have been tossed by the wind and have been hurt by the circumstances, and I’ve been embarrassed to the highest degree. Sagpa diri, dapog didto… I’ve been experiencing that for the past few weeks.

Yet, despite the slapping of the face that He did to me just recently, He has shown me His grace. He has hurt me enough to remind me that I should not take control of my life but He has not let me bleed to death. I had to go through a lot of embarrassments but His hands, the same hands that slapped me, were still there to protect me. That’s what a good Father does to His children!

I have not really changed that much but I hope that this could be the start of a new life for me. I hope that God would continue to give me more SAGPAs and DAPOGs in the future. Hehehe….


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